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April Rain

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April Rain

One Is Glad to Be of Service (In Memory of Robin Williams)

-Goddamn it, Andrew! If you're going to succeed at this thing you're trying to do... you've got to stop being so damn deferential.
-I can't help being deferential. It's built-in.
-Then change.
- Change? I have changed.
- I don't mean on the outside. Change on the inside. Take chances, make mistakes. Sometimes it's important not to be perfect. It's important to do the wrong thing!
-Do the wrong thing?
- Why? I see. To learn from your mistakes.
- No. To make them! To find out what's real and what's not, to find out what you feel. Human beings are terrible messes.
- I'll grant you that. I see. This is what is known as an irrational conversation, isn't it?
- This is a human conversation. It's not about being rational. It's about following your heart.
-And that's what I should do?
-Yes. And you have a heart, Andrew. I feel it. I don't even believe it sometimes, but I do feel it.
- And in order to follow that heart... one must do the wrong thing.
- Yes.
- Thank you.

-So you're not married yet?
-No, two weeks from Saturday.
-I'm not too late. Are you positive you're doing the right thing?
-About getting married?
-I'm never positive about anything.
-You could be doing the wrong thing.
-I'm pretty sure I'm doing the right thing.
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-Why is that great?
-You told me to do the wrong thing. You aren't doing the wrong thing, you're doing the right thing. You're not following your own advice, 'cause if you were you wouldn't marry him.
-Because I would be doing the right thing.
-In some strange way, you're starting to make sense.
-Good. You know what it's like to be in love with someone who's marrying someone else? Someone who's magnificent? Someone who walks into a room and lights it up like the sun? Someone who you know is lying to herself?
-Convincingly. Very much so.
-About what?
-That you don't love me when I know, at least in some way, you do.
-And how do you know that?
-I have done everything, inside and out.
-That stuff doesn't matter to me.
-Something matters. If nothing mattered, you'd love me... and not some man whose chin could sink the Titanic.
- What? See? It's true, isn't it?
-Does he light you up like this? Does he make you laugh?
-Nobody makes me laugh like this.
-Good. Then admit it. Admit that you love me. Give me one kiss. That's all. One quick kiss. Just one kiss could not jeopardise a glorious marriage. It would also explain why your pulse just jumped from 66 to 102 beats per minute. Your respiration is doubled. You're putting out clouds of pheromones.
-It's not fair to read me like that.
-I know. Love isn't fair. I'm reading your heart. I'm asking you to follow it. Begging you. Begging is supposed to be humiliating. I don't care. I love you, Portia. I loved you the very first moment I saw you.